Words written by Kathryn Dawe….
OMG! These patterns! Someone fetch me some scissors!
Better yet…fetch me my sledge hammer! What?! Wait…..seriously, these patterns have a hold on me and just won’t let the hell go…..or maybe the case is actually, that I’ve got ahold of the pattern and I can’t seem to let go of it….or escape it….or sidestep it…or vault over it…not to mention it’s “them” as in several, as opposed to “it” being one…..I’ve even attempted to most fiercely ignore these hinderances….but, alas, they seem tethered to me like the “unbreakable vow”…..something to which I absolutely do not recall agreement….I mean really, what is with these seemingly inescapable patterns? #sayitisntso
You know, I’ve come to realize that we create our patterns ourselves….not that we don’t possibly “have a little help from our ‘friends'”….but, I believe that they form from a repetition of events that feel or seem similar or familiar….and the more often these happen, the more often they will seem to happen, because this is what we expect and what we see….we have trained ourselves that if there is even just a hint of this one familiar thing, then it means this thing over here….so….it becomes a foregone conclusion, our reactions are rote and the pattern is solidly formed and gets deeper and more ingrained in our brain and psychology the longer we walk these paths….which can seem more like deep trenches the longer that we walk them… #roundandroundwego
SO, let’s say that, if you in fact create these patterns, then it is entirely possible to UN-create them…or even RE-create them as something else completely….like an old pair of jeans that you turn into a skirt #soeigthiesman, or old flannel shirts that you make into a quilt….something that you can use and that may even propel you into growth or change …ok, I understand that this can seem like a stretch, but you see what I’m getting at here, right? I’ve tried so many different tactics to escape long held patterns…most of them involving denial and force, which only seems to create further resistance and deeper patterning….like using a strong grip to open that one jar, when it opened easily with a gentle grip….sewing takes finesse and accuracy and precision…a knowing of how the upper thread spool, and the thread tension, and the lower thread bobbin work together….powered by the gentle but firm pressure of your foot on the “accelerator”…you need to know what type of stitch to use, what gauge needle will work best without breaking…you don’t sew with duct tape, caulk or glue and just hope for the best…. have intention behind what you do, and a vision….and if you don’t like what you see…..well, out comes the seam ripper and you can gently tear those seams that are holding this particular pattern together….letting the pieces fall to the floor…just fall away, to expose the bareness underneath….I understand that this may create fear, sadness, or grieving of sorts, and vulnerability for sure, to lose these pieces that have been such a part of you…in spite of the fact that they are doing you harm…it is still a loss of the familiar, that can seem safe even if it is harmful for you…. #notsorryforthistruth
Let’s take back the form of “You”….Let’s use a gentle hand, and a compassionate heart with our patterns….Let’s sew ourselves a cape of compassion, patience and no small amount of courage….Let’s uncover ourselves and let the patterns fall to the floor piece by piece….pieces of woundings, traumas, hurts, teachings, beliefs and any other thing that has kept you stuck…. mourn these if you need to, yell at them, or write them down and throw them away…and then recognize and believe that they will be replaced with something better…and truly the only way to do this is to relinquish your past positions in order to step into the growth that will bring you the change that you so sorely need and want…. #isurrender
What are some of the patterns in your life that are keeping you stuck? What would your life be like if these patterns did not exist? What positions in regard to the past, have kept you from moving forward?